I've been thinking about this topic a lot and I've come up with some additional ideas.
One of the things I struggle with the most is consistency. There is just something in my personal style that rebels against doing anything the same way every time. I never get up at the same time, eat at the same time, I don't do things in the same order, I basically never do the same thing any two days in a row or do anything the same way as anyone else. On the one hand, this gives me a sense of individuality and personal freedom, but on the other hand, it really interfers with my productivity.
Sometimes I really envy people who can do this. Women who always serve chicken on Mondays, spaghetti on Tuesdays, etc. People who can remember to water plants twice a week, people who can schedule their lives with complete regularity and know they'll be able to stick to the same routine week after week. My in-laws were like that and it really fascinated me that they could remember to rotate tires, change furnace filters, and set the coffee maker every single night before bed. I envy people like that, but on the other hand, I also have a mild contempt for them. Routine seems appealing to me, but on the other hand, it seems very boring and predictable and robotic to me and I think that's why I reject it so completely.
Which leaves me stuck with a problem. There are just certain things that need to be done on a schedule and housework is definitely best when done in some kind of a routine manner So, how to integrate my personal style into this process?
As you can see, I'm a computer gal. I spend large chunks of my time on the computer, both at work and at home. I probably have a computer screen in my face for 12 to 15 hours a day, every day. And computers are fabulous at routines. Sounds like a win-win to me!
So what I've started to do is to use my E-mail and my calendar to help me along. I already have a lot of reminders set up for my work. It helps me to know when to run reports, when to turn in timesheets, and all that kind of stuff. So now, I've set up all kinds of reminders for my personal life as well. And the nice thing is that I can include my family in this too. I've gone through and set appointments with reminders for myself to tidy the kitchen every night, fold laundry, and a bunch of other things. But I've also set all the kid's chores up as appointments as well. There are weekly appointments to take out the trash, mop the floors, and cook dinner one night a week. There is even a monthly reminder to my older son and husband to check the fluids in the cars.
The reminders pop up in their E-mail boxes and for my son, as a text on his cell phone. I even have penalties written right into them. When the task is sent out, it says, this task must be done by bedtime, or you will need to do this and this tomorrow. I think this qualifies as a brilliant idea and I think it will go a long ways towards keeping me on track with my life.
PS: I have another idea, but I need to scoot off to work. I'll post that one another time.
2/4/09
Working with your personal style
You know, we all have the same problem - where ever you go, there you are. I know that's an old joke, but it's really true. We all have pretty much the same struggles and basically you can find ways to adapt to your personality, or you can fight against it. Which one do you think will be more successful?
Here's a way that I've done that and been successful and then I'll tell you one that I'm still struggling with. I inherited that "shopping gene" from my mother and I have had a lot of struggles with not being able to control myself in stores. I'm especially bad with discount stores like Wal-Mart, Costco, and even dollar stores. I will go in there for one thing and come out with $50 worth of stuff. So, I have adjusted my lifestyle so I just don't go into the stores. I either buy stuff on-line, or I make lists and I give them to my husband or son - even for groceries. It's a hassle, but it saves me from that sick feeling I get when I've just blown a whole week's grocery money on a bunch of stuff that I wanted, but didn't necessarily need. That's a good example of working with your personality rather than against it.
Here's an example that I'm still struggling with. I like to do things in batches. I don't want to fold one load of laundry, I want to fold 5 loads at once. I don't want to sweep one little patch of floor, I want to sweep ALL my floors. Even at work, I don't want to do one or two invoices at a time when I can wait a day or so and do twenty of them. Even though I know it's much more efficient to do things a little bit at a time, my whole way of operating is that I want to do the big high-visibility clean ups instead of the little everyday cleanups.
So the question is do I work with this trait or against it? I haven't quite figured that one out yet. I never said I had all the answers, did I? I think the answer is going to be some kind of a compromise - define the jobs that really need to be done on a daily basis and then make my peace with doing the larger jobs in big chunks and just schedule them accordingly so they get done on some kind of a sensible time frame.
Here's a way that I've done that and been successful and then I'll tell you one that I'm still struggling with. I inherited that "shopping gene" from my mother and I have had a lot of struggles with not being able to control myself in stores. I'm especially bad with discount stores like Wal-Mart, Costco, and even dollar stores. I will go in there for one thing and come out with $50 worth of stuff. So, I have adjusted my lifestyle so I just don't go into the stores. I either buy stuff on-line, or I make lists and I give them to my husband or son - even for groceries. It's a hassle, but it saves me from that sick feeling I get when I've just blown a whole week's grocery money on a bunch of stuff that I wanted, but didn't necessarily need. That's a good example of working with your personality rather than against it.
Here's an example that I'm still struggling with. I like to do things in batches. I don't want to fold one load of laundry, I want to fold 5 loads at once. I don't want to sweep one little patch of floor, I want to sweep ALL my floors. Even at work, I don't want to do one or two invoices at a time when I can wait a day or so and do twenty of them. Even though I know it's much more efficient to do things a little bit at a time, my whole way of operating is that I want to do the big high-visibility clean ups instead of the little everyday cleanups.
So the question is do I work with this trait or against it? I haven't quite figured that one out yet. I never said I had all the answers, did I? I think the answer is going to be some kind of a compromise - define the jobs that really need to be done on a daily basis and then make my peace with doing the larger jobs in big chunks and just schedule them accordingly so they get done on some kind of a sensible time frame.
2/1/09
Stress Reduction
How is the stress level in your life? We all have stresses in our lives that come and go and some periods in your life are worse than others. If you are struggling with jobs and finances and worrying about the economy, like many people, this period of time can be an especially stressful one for you. Other times, there will be issues with kids, or struggles with family members, or serious health problems to deal with. The list is endless and the stress can be unrelenting.
When the outside world is crazy, that is the time that you need a calm environment in your home even more than ever. Home needs to be your refuge, your place to relax and recharge your batteries to get out there and deal with everything the next day. But if your home is chaotic and disorganized, it deprives you and your family of that needed tranquility.
This doesn't mean that your home needs to be absolutely perfect, or that it needs to look like something right out of a magazine. If anything, homes like that make me a little bit edgy. I'm always worried that I'm going to mess something up, or forget and leave something out of order. But if your counters and floors are clear from clutter and your living areas aren't full of uncompleted projects screaming at you all the time, you will feel a wonderful sense of calm.
Be sure to schedule some time in every day to do something for yourself. Even if it's just 10 minutes to leaf through a magazine, do a quick Yoga workout, or take a little cat nap, it will do a lot to minimize your stress level and recharge your batteries.
I think Moms especially feel guilty about taking these little moments, but really who is going to mind. If you went through your family and took a poll on the matter and asked them - do you think Mom has the right to a few minutes for herself everyday? They'd probably shrug their shoulders and say - sure, why not? So THEY aren't the ones putting the pressure on us, WE are the ones doing it to ourselves. OK Moms, so loosen up a little! The world is NOT going to go to pieces if you take a few minutes here and there to take care of yourself.
When the outside world is crazy, that is the time that you need a calm environment in your home even more than ever. Home needs to be your refuge, your place to relax and recharge your batteries to get out there and deal with everything the next day. But if your home is chaotic and disorganized, it deprives you and your family of that needed tranquility.
This doesn't mean that your home needs to be absolutely perfect, or that it needs to look like something right out of a magazine. If anything, homes like that make me a little bit edgy. I'm always worried that I'm going to mess something up, or forget and leave something out of order. But if your counters and floors are clear from clutter and your living areas aren't full of uncompleted projects screaming at you all the time, you will feel a wonderful sense of calm.
Be sure to schedule some time in every day to do something for yourself. Even if it's just 10 minutes to leaf through a magazine, do a quick Yoga workout, or take a little cat nap, it will do a lot to minimize your stress level and recharge your batteries.
I think Moms especially feel guilty about taking these little moments, but really who is going to mind. If you went through your family and took a poll on the matter and asked them - do you think Mom has the right to a few minutes for herself everyday? They'd probably shrug their shoulders and say - sure, why not? So THEY aren't the ones putting the pressure on us, WE are the ones doing it to ourselves. OK Moms, so loosen up a little! The world is NOT going to go to pieces if you take a few minutes here and there to take care of yourself.
1/31/09
Great Kitchen Strategies
Here are some easy strategies that will help your kitchen clean-up be a breeze.
1. Start with a clean kitchen. If you have cleaned your kitchen the night before, you'll find it much easier to keep it cleaner. Remember that clutter breeds more clutter.
2. Clean up as you go. Run a sink full of warm soapy water before you start cooking. As you finish using each pan and pot, slip it into the soapy water to soak until the meal is complete. Keep a clean dishcloth handy to wipe up any spills as they happen.
3. Use the one-touch method. If you take out a spice, don't set it back on the counter. Pick up the spice, use it, and put it right back without in the cupboard. This tip alone will be a big help to you and you'll have a lot less clutter.
4. Take a minute before you serve the meal to transfer the pots and pans to the dishwasher.
5. Train your family to put their dishes directly into the dishwasher. I sometimes leave large notes on the counter to remind them not to place their dishes there. Even young children can do this if you take a few minutes to show them how and it will give them a sense of accomplishment.
6. If possible, try to get the whole family involved in the evening tidy up process. If everyone helps, you can have the kitchen sparkling clean in just a few minutes. It's building good habits for everyone and if you try to make it fun, it can be a nice family time. Feel free to splash a little water on each other, snap your husband with a towel, challenge your kids to see who can wipe their half of the table the quickest.
6. Immediately after dinner, start the dishwasher. Then you can empty the dishwasher before bed and the dishwasher will be ready for the next day's dishes. That is one of the key components to keeping a kitchen clean, is to have somewhere to put the dirty dishes.
1. Start with a clean kitchen. If you have cleaned your kitchen the night before, you'll find it much easier to keep it cleaner. Remember that clutter breeds more clutter.
2. Clean up as you go. Run a sink full of warm soapy water before you start cooking. As you finish using each pan and pot, slip it into the soapy water to soak until the meal is complete. Keep a clean dishcloth handy to wipe up any spills as they happen.
3. Use the one-touch method. If you take out a spice, don't set it back on the counter. Pick up the spice, use it, and put it right back without in the cupboard. This tip alone will be a big help to you and you'll have a lot less clutter.
4. Take a minute before you serve the meal to transfer the pots and pans to the dishwasher.
5. Train your family to put their dishes directly into the dishwasher. I sometimes leave large notes on the counter to remind them not to place their dishes there. Even young children can do this if you take a few minutes to show them how and it will give them a sense of accomplishment.
6. If possible, try to get the whole family involved in the evening tidy up process. If everyone helps, you can have the kitchen sparkling clean in just a few minutes. It's building good habits for everyone and if you try to make it fun, it can be a nice family time. Feel free to splash a little water on each other, snap your husband with a towel, challenge your kids to see who can wipe their half of the table the quickest.
6. Immediately after dinner, start the dishwasher. Then you can empty the dishwasher before bed and the dishwasher will be ready for the next day's dishes. That is one of the key components to keeping a kitchen clean, is to have somewhere to put the dirty dishes.
1/26/09
Selling Your Unwanted Items
As part of the decluttering process, you're going to run into times when it makes sense to sell stuff. Whether it's clothes, toys, furniture, or sporting goods, there is a pretty healthy market for used stuff and you can take advantage of that. Are you going to make a ton of money this way? No, you aren't. You'll be lucky to make pennies on the dollar, but it gets people to show up at your house and cart stuff off and pay you a few bucks for the privilege.
Ebay is probably the most well-known site for selling your used stuff. I used to be an Ebay seller and I have extensive experience in this area both as a buyer and a seller. My advice is to only use Ebay for small, shippable items that are worth at least $100. Otherwise, the fees are just too much. How do you determine if something is worth $100? Go out and search for similar items and see what price they are going for. Search completed items if you can. That way you get what the item actually sold for and not what someone was asking for it.
Amazon is probably a less known site for selling your items, but I actually like it a lot better than Ebay. Even though it is mostly limited to books, CD's, and movies, it is SO much simpler to use. Ebay has about 5 screens that you have to go through and you have to submit a picture. Amazon has 1 screen where you just describe the condition of your item and select your price - much easier. The other nice thing about Amazon is that they pay Amazon directly so you don't have to wrangle with the buyer to receive the payment. It just automatically pops into your account minus a small fee for Amazon. They even give you a budget for postage.
In fact, I just sold a book on there yesterday. I had a book called the Green Collar Economy that I had bought from Amazon for about $18. I read most of it, got what I wanted out of it and posted it back for resale simply by going to the screen where I bought it and clicking the Sell Your Item button. I put my condition - like new, and set my price compared to the other items for sale out there. Then I just waited a couple of weeks for my E-mail telling me it was sold and I pop it in the mail and collect my $15.
PS: I also save a lot of money by buying pretty much all of my books, movies, and CD's from Amazon. Sometimes I buy them new, but a lot of the time, I save a few bucks by buying used copies in good condition and I've never been disappointed.
Craigslist and other local selling sites. I think Craigslist.com is brilliant! I've been using it for about 2 years and I've sold probably dozens of items through it. Anything from end tables to hamster cages to cars (I've sold my last 3 cars online). Craigslist is located in most major cities and it's FREE. You just log onto it and select the city you live in. Then if you want to sell something, you just type up a description of it, post a picture or two, and set a price. Then people call or E-mail you to come and buy it. One caution - Craiglist has a very high "flake" rate. I usually have 4 or 5 people contact me before someone actually shows up. I control this by telling people that I am only going to be available at a certain time for an hour or so and if they don't show up, I will leave. There are also similar sites popping up at most TV and radio station websites. There is even a listing for free stuff, so if you have something you just want hauled away, put it out there and more than likely, somebody will show up in a truck and haul it off.
Garage sales/Estate sales - There's a good reason I'm putting this last. Over my lifetime, I have probably done half a dozen or so garage sales or estate sales and I just HATE them. They are so much work for so little money, I just don't think they are hardly worth the effort. You spend the whole darn morning hauling your junk out into the yard and then spend the rest of the day haggling with idiots who want to buy everything for a quarter. Then you're stuck with all the junk that didn't sell anyway. I think if it's just little stuff like clothes, shoes, kid's toys, paperbacks, and old VHS tapes, you're better to just give them to charity and take a write-off on your taxes.
If you do need to do an estate sale, come and see me for advice. We've now lost all four of our parents, so we've been through this a couple of times and we can give you some good advice on how to do it effectively.
Ebay is probably the most well-known site for selling your used stuff. I used to be an Ebay seller and I have extensive experience in this area both as a buyer and a seller. My advice is to only use Ebay for small, shippable items that are worth at least $100. Otherwise, the fees are just too much. How do you determine if something is worth $100? Go out and search for similar items and see what price they are going for. Search completed items if you can. That way you get what the item actually sold for and not what someone was asking for it.
Amazon is probably a less known site for selling your items, but I actually like it a lot better than Ebay. Even though it is mostly limited to books, CD's, and movies, it is SO much simpler to use. Ebay has about 5 screens that you have to go through and you have to submit a picture. Amazon has 1 screen where you just describe the condition of your item and select your price - much easier. The other nice thing about Amazon is that they pay Amazon directly so you don't have to wrangle with the buyer to receive the payment. It just automatically pops into your account minus a small fee for Amazon. They even give you a budget for postage.
In fact, I just sold a book on there yesterday. I had a book called the Green Collar Economy that I had bought from Amazon for about $18. I read most of it, got what I wanted out of it and posted it back for resale simply by going to the screen where I bought it and clicking the Sell Your Item button. I put my condition - like new, and set my price compared to the other items for sale out there. Then I just waited a couple of weeks for my E-mail telling me it was sold and I pop it in the mail and collect my $15.
PS: I also save a lot of money by buying pretty much all of my books, movies, and CD's from Amazon. Sometimes I buy them new, but a lot of the time, I save a few bucks by buying used copies in good condition and I've never been disappointed.
Craigslist and other local selling sites. I think Craigslist.com is brilliant! I've been using it for about 2 years and I've sold probably dozens of items through it. Anything from end tables to hamster cages to cars (I've sold my last 3 cars online). Craigslist is located in most major cities and it's FREE. You just log onto it and select the city you live in. Then if you want to sell something, you just type up a description of it, post a picture or two, and set a price. Then people call or E-mail you to come and buy it. One caution - Craiglist has a very high "flake" rate. I usually have 4 or 5 people contact me before someone actually shows up. I control this by telling people that I am only going to be available at a certain time for an hour or so and if they don't show up, I will leave. There are also similar sites popping up at most TV and radio station websites. There is even a listing for free stuff, so if you have something you just want hauled away, put it out there and more than likely, somebody will show up in a truck and haul it off.
Garage sales/Estate sales - There's a good reason I'm putting this last. Over my lifetime, I have probably done half a dozen or so garage sales or estate sales and I just HATE them. They are so much work for so little money, I just don't think they are hardly worth the effort. You spend the whole darn morning hauling your junk out into the yard and then spend the rest of the day haggling with idiots who want to buy everything for a quarter. Then you're stuck with all the junk that didn't sell anyway. I think if it's just little stuff like clothes, shoes, kid's toys, paperbacks, and old VHS tapes, you're better to just give them to charity and take a write-off on your taxes.
If you do need to do an estate sale, come and see me for advice. We've now lost all four of our parents, so we've been through this a couple of times and we can give you some good advice on how to do it effectively.
1/25/09
Are You Running a Homeless Shelter?
Take a minute to mentally look around your house and see how many "homeless" items you have taking up space around your house. These can be items that have an established home, but are "vacationing" in another area. Or truly homeless items that don't have a home to begin with. How many of these freeloaders are you willing to put up with?
Keep in mind that these items are taking up space that is needed for legitimate items, and also clean, open space that is needed for your sanity. And after all, how much is THAT worth?
These items really just represent the postponed decisions in your life. You don't necessarily want them, but you haven't made the time to really sit down and take the time to evaluate them and take the steps necessary to either find them a permanent home, or send them on their way. It doesn't have to be a big chunk of time. Even five minutes is enough time to go through a shelf, or a drawer, or a pile of papers sitting in a corner. You can spare five minutes can't you? Shoot, that's one round of commercials during a TV program. And after a few five minute sessions here and there, things will start looking a whole lot better!
I read a great quote this week "When you clear the clutter out of your life, the stuff you really want has room to show up". Think about it. When you clear all the excess clutter in your schedule, you have time to do the fun stuff with your friends and family. When you clear the excess "clutter" from your body, you have room for new, pretty clothes and a more fun and active lifestyle, not to mention a few extra years of time on this earth.
When you clear the excess clutter out of your home, you are not only freeing up physical space, you are freeing up your time from cleaning as much, you are freeing up more space that makes it easier to store and use the items you want to have and enjoy using. You also free up your spirit from the stress and guilt of all that clutter. And honestly, what is it about all that junk that is worth all that hassle?
I have done countless decluttering missions in my house over the years. Everything from clothes, to toys, books, movies, and papers. I've sent boxes and boxes of stuff to charity and you know what? If my life depended on it, I couldn't tell you 5 things that I've gotten rid of.
If you really want to learn how to declutter your house and get out of the homeless shelter business - contact me about signing up for my next round of Messy Moms classes. I'll be starting a new one in a couple of weeks and if you're in the Salt Lake area, I'd love to have you join.
Keep in mind that these items are taking up space that is needed for legitimate items, and also clean, open space that is needed for your sanity. And after all, how much is THAT worth?
These items really just represent the postponed decisions in your life. You don't necessarily want them, but you haven't made the time to really sit down and take the time to evaluate them and take the steps necessary to either find them a permanent home, or send them on their way. It doesn't have to be a big chunk of time. Even five minutes is enough time to go through a shelf, or a drawer, or a pile of papers sitting in a corner. You can spare five minutes can't you? Shoot, that's one round of commercials during a TV program. And after a few five minute sessions here and there, things will start looking a whole lot better!
I read a great quote this week "When you clear the clutter out of your life, the stuff you really want has room to show up". Think about it. When you clear all the excess clutter in your schedule, you have time to do the fun stuff with your friends and family. When you clear the excess "clutter" from your body, you have room for new, pretty clothes and a more fun and active lifestyle, not to mention a few extra years of time on this earth.
When you clear the excess clutter out of your home, you are not only freeing up physical space, you are freeing up your time from cleaning as much, you are freeing up more space that makes it easier to store and use the items you want to have and enjoy using. You also free up your spirit from the stress and guilt of all that clutter. And honestly, what is it about all that junk that is worth all that hassle?
I have done countless decluttering missions in my house over the years. Everything from clothes, to toys, books, movies, and papers. I've sent boxes and boxes of stuff to charity and you know what? If my life depended on it, I couldn't tell you 5 things that I've gotten rid of.
If you really want to learn how to declutter your house and get out of the homeless shelter business - contact me about signing up for my next round of Messy Moms classes. I'll be starting a new one in a couple of weeks and if you're in the Salt Lake area, I'd love to have you join.
1/18/09
That CFC - Clean for Company Feeling
Does your house look different on "company" days than it does on "regular" days? If so, you're not alone. I don't know how many times my kids would ask me why we were cleaning up - was company coming? And that would make me sad because I was teaching them that other people were more important than they were in terms of keeping the house clean.
I used to really hate those CFC days. I would get so anxious when I knew someone was going to be coming over. I would feel like they were going to see my house in a negative light and I would spend all my time running around frantically cleaning up because I was so worried I would be embarrassed about my house. I would not only set aside anything else I had going on, but I was force my family to do the same and yell at them if I felt they weren't doing it "right". It was really horrible and as much as I love to spend time with other people, I would really dread it when they wanted to come over to my house. I would usually try to plan events so we would go out or go to someone else's house instead and only have people over when it really couldn't be avoided. What a sad way to live.
Now that I've made some changes, I love to have company over. I usually still need to do a bit of tidying up, but it's not a big major day-long process like it used to be. I can usually spend from 5 to 15 minutes on each room instead of an hour or more. Also, I've learned to adjust my attitude. I don't feel like my self-worth is tied up so much in the state of my house. If someone drops by and catches me on a bad day and the house is a bit messy, I don't freak out.
And more importantly, I don't apologize. That always seems kind of insecure to me when someone gets all flustered and starts making excuses for why the house is messy. It is what it is, but I can't worry about what someone else is thinking or how they're going to react. That is up to them and me making a big deal over how the house looks is just going to make it worse.
I think it's nice when we can give our families the gift of a clean house. It's great to have that for your friends, but your family spends a lot more time there and if they can enjoy that CFC feeling on a regular basis, that's a good benefit for them. Being in a clean space is more peaceful and relaxing, and also leads your family to want to help you more and keep their own areas cleaner. I was reading this post the other day on Unclutterer where they've done all these studies where even a tiny bit of clutter breeds more clutter. So by providing your family with a clutter-free environment, you are helping them to develop good clutter habits that will serve them well later in life.
Flylady has a great saying - "Housework done incorrectly still blesses your family". I interpret this to mean that we don't have to be perfect, we just have to get off our little fannies and do our best for our families.
I used to really hate those CFC days. I would get so anxious when I knew someone was going to be coming over. I would feel like they were going to see my house in a negative light and I would spend all my time running around frantically cleaning up because I was so worried I would be embarrassed about my house. I would not only set aside anything else I had going on, but I was force my family to do the same and yell at them if I felt they weren't doing it "right". It was really horrible and as much as I love to spend time with other people, I would really dread it when they wanted to come over to my house. I would usually try to plan events so we would go out or go to someone else's house instead and only have people over when it really couldn't be avoided. What a sad way to live.
Now that I've made some changes, I love to have company over. I usually still need to do a bit of tidying up, but it's not a big major day-long process like it used to be. I can usually spend from 5 to 15 minutes on each room instead of an hour or more. Also, I've learned to adjust my attitude. I don't feel like my self-worth is tied up so much in the state of my house. If someone drops by and catches me on a bad day and the house is a bit messy, I don't freak out.
And more importantly, I don't apologize. That always seems kind of insecure to me when someone gets all flustered and starts making excuses for why the house is messy. It is what it is, but I can't worry about what someone else is thinking or how they're going to react. That is up to them and me making a big deal over how the house looks is just going to make it worse.
I think it's nice when we can give our families the gift of a clean house. It's great to have that for your friends, but your family spends a lot more time there and if they can enjoy that CFC feeling on a regular basis, that's a good benefit for them. Being in a clean space is more peaceful and relaxing, and also leads your family to want to help you more and keep their own areas cleaner. I was reading this post the other day on Unclutterer where they've done all these studies where even a tiny bit of clutter breeds more clutter. So by providing your family with a clutter-free environment, you are helping them to develop good clutter habits that will serve them well later in life.
Flylady has a great saying - "Housework done incorrectly still blesses your family". I interpret this to mean that we don't have to be perfect, we just have to get off our little fannies and do our best for our families.
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